Quick backstory to why I started this platform...
What was life like for me growing up?
Growing up in an African household especially, setting boundaries wasn't something I was necessarily taught…I grew up with a dad (who I still love aha) who practically forced me to pursue a medicine degree even though my heart wasn't in it - I felt like I had no say and feared communicating this with him as I didn’t want to let him down. Growing up, I realised this played a part in me seeking validation and permission to do certain things in other areas of my life. I couldn't trust myself to make my own decisions.
My mother on the other hand - I know she didn’t pursue certain things she wanted to do in order to provide for me and my siblings alongside my dad. My mum is the most loving, giving person and always makes sure people have what they need. She overloves sometimes…and I think that’s what I’ve got from her 😂
In fact, as women it’s in our nature to nurture - we can really LOVE. This is why I created this space with us women in mind - we can be more vulnerable to please and satisfy others to our detriment.
Things changed when I started reading a book, called ‘Boundaries’ last summer. By looking at the lessons I learnt growing up, seeking therapy and alongside wisdom from the book, it shifted my whole perspective and I realised I had been people-pleasing for a long time. Not being able to say ‘no’ is something I’ve struggled with a lot in the past and I know the severe consequences it can have on your wellbeing. It can really stop you living authentically, being true to ourselves - which is so damaging to our souls and your PURPOSE in the long term😭
Despite ‘boundaries’ being a buzzword in this day and age, I found it was commonly associated with saying no - but boundaries are much much more than that. It overlaps with our self-worth, our past traumas, our upbringing and the way we communicate. So you most likely have not grown up in a similar environment to me, but we all need help with boundaries - regardless of where you come from. I started @homeofamare because I was seeing something that wasn’t talked about enough - even in the wellness / personal development space.
….Boundaries and maintaining them.
So with @homeofamare, I hope to create, collaborate with great people as we explore what it means to set healthy boundaries in order thrive in relationships and abound in life. I'm creating a home-like safe space that would have been better for us growing up.
So, again welcome Reader - our home is your home - I’m glad your here!🧡